代写留学生dissertation如何实现简明生动
11-01, 2018
一篇优秀的留学生dissertation在语言表达上应该是什么样？只是拥有复杂的句式、高级的词汇、大量的短语词组？在小编，留学生dissertation大多属于学术dissertation，并不需要太过华丽的表达，简明生动才是重要的。国外有句话是这么说的：Never use ten words where five will do.那留学生dissertation如何才能做到简明生动呢？下面小编教大家两个技巧。
1、简化句子结构，增强活力和表现力
① 以it，here, or there be开头且指引的是句中的名词，同时句子里常常跟上to be/ to do的句子结构，比如it is, it was, here is, there is, therewill be……这些结构往往不再强调句中实际的驱动者成分，把true driver的意义稀释了，而且这种结构通常需要其他关系词来支撑和联接，如who, that and when，进一步dilute你的文章。具体来说，比如：
There are some bloggers who seem to have...
这里的thereare 把句子的重心放在了模糊的概念there上，而不是句中的true focus，即some bloggers, 而且作者还需要加上who这个语法上需要但实际没什么含义的关系词。这样就用了三个不必要的filler words（填充词），另一方面还把句中的实义动词弱化了。顺便提个醒，不要碰到“有”就想到there be句型。
再举一些例子：
✗ Wordy：It's fun to editing.
✔ Concise：Editing is fun.
✗ Wordy：There are many people who write.
✔ Concise：Many people write.
✗Wordy：Here are some things to consider：
✔Concise：Some things to consider are:
② 适当地把后置定语从句改成前置形容词，比如：
✗Wordy：Do not try to anticipate those events that will completely revolutionize society.
✔Concise：Do not try to anticipate revolutionary events.
③ 把伴随动作状语改成副词，比如：
✗Wordy：Sympathizing with her concerns, he nodded in response to her complaint.
✔Concise：He nodded sympathetically in response to her complaint.
④“which is” 、 “who were”等有时可以删除但保留原义且无伤语法，比如：
✗Wordy：We drove down Lombard Street, which is considered the crookedest street in the world.
✔Concise：We drove down Lombard Street,considered the crookedest street in the world.
⑤ 介词短语改写，比如：
✗Wordy： The opinion of the working group.
✔Concise： The working group's opinion.
2、可以用动词来描述的时候就尽量避开弱化语气的名词化表达
比如当你看到“verb+ a/an noun” 的组合结构,直接用实义动词来代替该短语，简化句子的同时增强句子活力。比如：
✗Wordy：The report gave an analysis of the accident.
✔Concise：The report analyzed the accident.
✗Wordy：Give your post a proofread.#p#分页标题#e#
✔Concise：Proofread your post.
✗Wordy：Alcohol is the cause of hangovers.
✔Concise：Alcohol causes hangovers.
✗Wordy： The stability and quality of our financial performance will be developed through the profitable execution of our existing business, as well as the acquisition or development of new businesses.
✔Concise： We will improve our financial performance not only by executing our existing business more profitably but by acquiring or developing new businesses.
1、简化句子结构，增强活力和表现力
① 以it，here, or there be开头且指引的是句中的名词，同时句子里常常跟上to be/ to do的句子结构，比如it is, it was, here is, there is, therewill be……这些结构往往不再强调句中实际的驱动者成分，把true driver的意义稀释了，而且这种结构通常需要其他关系词来支撑和联接，如who, that and when，进一步dilute你的文章。具体来说，比如：
There are some bloggers who seem to have...
这里的thereare 把句子的重心放在了模糊的概念there上，而不是句中的true focus，即some bloggers, 而且作者还需要加上who这个语法上需要但实际没什么含义的关系词。这样就用了三个不必要的filler words（填充词），另一方面还把句中的实义动词弱化了。顺便提个醒，不要碰到“有”就想到there be句型。
再举一些例子：
✗ Wordy：It's fun to editing.
✔ Concise：Editing is fun.
✗ Wordy：There are many people who write.
✔ Concise：Many people write.
✗Wordy：Here are some things to consider：
✔Concise：Some things to consider are:
② 适当地把后置定语从句改成前置形容词，比如：
✗Wordy：Do not try to anticipate those events that will completely revolutionize society.
✔Concise：Do not try to anticipate revolutionary events.
③ 把伴随动作状语改成副词，比如：
✗Wordy：Sympathizing with her concerns, he nodded in response to her complaint.
✔Concise：He nodded sympathetically in response to her complaint.
④“which is” 、 “who were”等有时可以删除但保留原义且无伤语法，比如：
✗Wordy：We drove down Lombard Street, which is considered the crookedest street in the world.
✔Concise：We drove down Lombard Street,considered the crookedest street in the world.
⑤ 介词短语改写，比如：
✗Wordy： The opinion of the working group.
✔Concise： The working group's opinion.
2、可以用动词来描述的时候就尽量避开弱化语气的名词化表达
比如当你看到“verb+ a/an noun” 的组合结构,直接用实义动词来代替该短语，简化句子的同时增强句子活力。比如：
✗Wordy：The report gave an analysis of the accident.
✔Concise：The report analyzed the accident.
✗Wordy：Give your post a proofread.#p#分页标题#e#
✔Concise：Proofread your post.
✗Wordy：Alcohol is the cause of hangovers.
✔Concise：Alcohol causes hangovers.
✗Wordy： The stability and quality of our financial performance will be developed through the profitable execution of our existing business, as well as the acquisition or development of new businesses.
✔Concise： We will improve our financial performance not only by executing our existing business more profitably but by acquiring or developing new businesses.
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